Do sessions have to go on for years?
The answer is no. Sometimes I work with a client for a few sessions only. Sometimes we might work together for two or three months. But yes, there are instances where I work with someone for a few years.
What reasons determine the length of time we work together when we talk about self development?
Many people coming to my practice are high functioning meaning, they have a career, relationship and sometimes a family. They look after their health – going to gym a few times a week and eat healthily. They go on holiday and have satisfying hobbies and interests. So why would such a person come to see me? The answer is two-fold. In one instance, it will lead to short-term work and in the other, long-term.
Short Term
Despite success, we often find that at some point in our lives, an area of vulnerability begins to trouble us in one or another area of our lives. At this point, we usually need to develop an aspect of functioning that we managed to do without in the past. It could be impacting you in the area of relationships or career.
For example, you grew up being rewarded and accepted for being a “people pleaser.” As a result, you sit on the phone for hours sometimes chatting to friends and family, giving them advice and supporting them. In the meantime, your favourite TV program comes and goes and you miss an episode you wanted to watch – again! Or…you should be preparing for that presentation at work…
There’s actually nothing wrong with being a great friend, a family confidant and a resource –these are great qualities to have. The problem is that you also need to think of yourself sometimes. You need to do some of the things you really enjoy doing and so, if you’ve been waiting to watch that TV program, you need to ask your friend to phone the following day. Well, this makes logical sense doesn’t it? All we need to do is to change our behaviour – don’t we. Well, the reality is that if it were that easy, we would all follow these logical steps and people would sort out their various issues easily.
What stops us from simply changing our inner attitudes? The problem is that while we were growing up, we may have learned that it’s “wrong” to put our own pleasure or needs before a friend or family member’s suffering and so we “cannot” put ourselves first – the guilt and feelings of being a “bad” person overwhelm us.
In such a situation, if we are helped to connect with another facet of ourselves – a part of us that can authentically feel and experience the value of also being available for our own needs, not only for those of others, this may be all we need in order to move on again with our everyday lives.
This is why we sometimes need to do some work with a person who has been trained to assist with self-development. And sometimes, it just takes a few weeks or a few months.
Long Term
Sometimes, we might need to work on an area that is more resistant and stubborn and these are the instances that lead to longer term self-developmental work.
Leslie Zimmermann is a Jungian Analyst trained in the philosophy and psychology of C.G. Jung in Zurich and is based in Johannesburg. She offers a range of services, which she integrates, to meet the needs and aspirations of people. In a word, her work is in the service of wholeness. Wholeness includes both our vulnerabilities and our strengths, becoming conscious of our own unique mix of these, honoring our own unique way of functioning and with this knowledge and confidence, contributing as only we each can in our own way, to this evolving world we find ourselves to be a part of.
Leslie specializes in Analytical Psychology, Voice Dialogue, Life Coaching solutions for business executives. Consulting and coaching for family owned and home-based business
For an appointment Leslie Zimmermann can be contacted on:
Email: leslie.zimmermann@gmail.com
Mobile: +27 (0)83 384 9812
Facebook Page: http://jungian.co.za/facebook